Baby Boy-16 months

 

Oh Baby Boy, where to begin. I get emotional just thinking about him. So many emotions in foster care.

Baby Boy is 16 months old in a few days. He feels so tiny! He is 21lbs and just feels as light as a feather to me. For comparison, Adele and Israel both broke 20lbs before they were 6 months old ;). His gross motor skills have come a long way! He is mostly all caught up physically. He started walking at 12 months and is now climbing and running all over the place. He is tall and skinny, and good thing we use cloth diapers or no pants would fit on his tiny bum. ;)

Baby Boy is VERY sensory seeking and probably has sensory processing disorder. What this looks like for him is that normal toys/baby experiences are not stimulating enough for him so he seeks out things that are, running, climbing, lifting heavy objects, playing in water, dirt, putting everything in his mouth and screaming often. I know these all sound like normal 1 year old behaviors, and they are, just for him they are done obsessively, if that makes sense. It makes him very difficult to watch. Being outside is the best place for him because all of his sensory needs are met and there are less things we have to keep him away from compared to in the house. He spent a lot of time in the backyard while it was warm. Also I'm SO grateful Leland has been working from home during the pandemic. It has helped tremendously to have another adult around to keep an eye on him because he can't be unsupervised ever. I don't put this out here to exploit his story, but just to normalize it a little. Many children from foster care  have these struggles. I have found a lot of comfort and help by talking to other foster moms that have gone through the same things with their toddlers. 

We are in early intervention to help him with these struggles as well as speech therapy. He was making amazing strides in early intervention until the pandemic hit and now all sessions are virtual. Virtual doesn't seems to be helping him much and it is frustrating. He is progressing though. His first and most common word is "Mama" (only one of my kids to not say Dada first) and he says a few other words like "hi" "here" and sometimes "more". We are also working on teaching him baby sign. 

As difficult as he can be sometimes, he really is a little sweetheart. They say hard babies give you a closer bond and I feel that in some ways. We have been through a lot together. Baby Boy is not very affectionate, but he will give me a kiss when I ask him, and he has started hugging people which is the cutest thing ever. When he comes home from visits he is so happy to see everyone, he runs into the arms of whichever kid is closest. He really loves Israel and loves to watch whatever he is doing. They share a room now and always fall asleep giggling together. 

Now for the part I'm sure everyone wants to know about, his case. When we started foster care, pretty much my worst case scenario was getting a newborn and having them for a long time then having to give them back. Well, it's a good thing that the Lord doesn't tell us our hardships ahead of time, he just gives us enough strength to get through it day by day. We still don't know what the future holds for him. his "final" court date is in December, at that time the judge should make the final decision about if he is being reunified or if the goal will change to adoption by us. If the goal is changed to adoption, that could be a very long process as a lot of trials are on hold and the courts are very backed up because of COVID. But that's another concern for another day. Right now we really are just taking it one day at a time, or one court date at a time.

We really do love him so much. My hope is that no matter what happens we can stay in his life. He feels like my baby and I know all the kids hardly remember life without him. They have all started praying that we can adopt him. The prayer in my heart is that whatever is best for him will happen, whether that's with us or with his mom, I don't know, I just hope he can have permanency soon because he deserves that.