Monday, February 8, 2016

Postpartum Life: The Good, The Bad, and So Much Crying

Adele is 11 days old today so I thought it was about time for a little update, including photos of my failed attempt to get newborn pictures of Adele. Don't worry, I took her to a professional to get real ones. But these ones still are cute right? Even if they do include a tablet in the background and a binky in her mouth...



THE GOOD:
+ Having a newborn the second time around is so much easier. When Esther came it really shook things up, but I guess we learned a lot the first time because this time is so much less stressful. I don't stress about breastfeeding or schedules or anything nearly as much as I did with Esther. Also waking up with her at night is a breeze because she just nurses and goes right back to sleep. If only Esther did the same...

+ As I said in my birth story, recovery this time seems too good to be true compared to a c section. Besides being tired 24-7 I physically feel almost back to normal now. Though I know I'm not so I'm still trying to take it easy



THE NOT SO GOOD:
Lest anyone think our life is perfect, the hard parts must be documented too.

+ Esther is still sick. This cold is on day 12 and no matter what we do her nose just keeps runnin. It's hard because it messes with her sleep, and we have to try to keep her from getting Adele sick, and it makes her crankier than she already is as an almost two year old, and we can't take her anywhere and we are all soooooo ready for her to be better. Especially because this is such a hard transition for her it makes it even harder for me to see her sick and not be able to give her 100% of my attention like I used to. 

+ I have watched UP and Walle so many times in the past two weeks I have lost count. Since Esther is sick + new baby we have been staying home all day everyday pretty much. And all Esther ever wants to do is watch TV. She is such an energetic kid that if she isn't watching tv she is probably destroying something or pulling knives out of the dishwasher while I am nursing, so tv keeps her occupied. I feel bad about the hours of tv a day she watches, but it's easier for me and she's supposed to be resting right? Someone please tell me that these justifications are valid...

+Postpartum life is hard. Just as you are settling in with your new baby you get hit with all the emotions all at once. With Esther I felt super sad and lonely for about two weeks after she was born, then it luckily subsided. This time has been a lot easier but I still get hit with the crazy emotions every once in a while. The first week was hard and things have been better since then. This time Leland's work schedule is a lot better so that helps, and I try to get as much sleep as I can which makes a huge difference.

SO MUCH CRYING:

So today I ventured out with the two babes by myself. I should have known not to even attempt it because Esther stayed up late because of the superbowl last night, and ended up having a horrible night. Plus she is still sick, but we needed milk so I decided to go to smiths. I drove further to the one that had car carts just to appease Esther, and I strapped Adele in the moby and headed into the store. Well there were no car carts and Esther just can not tolerate sitting in a normal cart, and there is no way I could let her walk, so we went back outside and scoured the parking lot until we found the car cart. I had Esther on my hip, Adele in the carrier on my front, and our giant diaper bag on the other hip so I'm sure I looked like quite a sight. But we found the beloved car cart that was probably infested with germs, and headed back into the store.

Things were going good until about 3/4ths of the way into the trip Esther spotted some cupcakes and decided she had to have them. She started repeating "tuptate" about 100 times, until I finally told her no she couldn't have one. Then she proceeded to scream and try to climb out of the cart. That girl can scream loud. I just had two more things to get so I was trying to hurry and get them and get out of there. A nice lady with a Russian accent came up and started talking to Esther and asking her what was wrong. That stopped the tears right in their tracks, for about 5 minutes, but long enough for me to check out and get out of there. 

Once we got to the car I loaded the groceries and loaded Adele in, and Esther picked up screaming right where she left off when she realized that she had to go in her car seat and leave her beloved car cart. I wrangled her in the straps, only to have to pull over two more times on the way home because she had gotten out of them. By that point she had woken up Adele with all her screaming and the tears were flowing for all 3 of us. We finally made it home, things calmed down, and Leland came home from work. Maybe some day I can look back on this and laugh. But in the mean time I will probably never leave the house with them both again. 



 Having two kids is hard, but I love them both so much. I know I am giving Esther a great gift by giving her a sister so close in age. The times when I see her loving on Adele, or when Adele looks at her like she is in this picture I know they'll someday be great friends and it makes the hard times worth it. Having a two year old and a new baby is also teaching me so much about myself and serving others and having patience. I am grateful to be their mom and grateful to the Lord for helping me through it.


Also on an unrelated note, don't they look so similar?! Adele is on the left and Esther is on the right. I feel like they basically look like twins. 


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